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Conte's
Article
 Trip to Conte's requires strong constitution Written by Emmet Meara The Rockland waterfront restaurant is one of the best-kept secrets of the midcoast area. First of all, you would NEVER walk in unless you knew quite well what was inside. The place looks like an abandoned bait shack. It has no illuminated sign and only the faintest light to let brave hearts find the front door. There is sawdust on the floor. There are no menus. The bill of fare is handwritten every night on a roll of butcher-block paper and you MUST order before you sit down, or incur the wrath of the feisty wait staff. Either Janice or Amy will cut you off at the knees if you break protocol. If they are glad to see you, they will never admit it. The customer is always wrong. The rumor is they did their training at Boston's Durgin Park restaurant, where rudeness is considered a sacrament. But they are a day at the beach compared to the fiery chef, John Conte. Like any artistic genius, Conte considered temperament to be his birthright. When he feels like closing the place, he simply walks out and screams at the waitresses and maybe a few customers. I have seen him empty the place in about 90 seconds. He won't advertise. He doesn't want to many people screwing up his evening. We don't care what he does as long as he lets us eat there. The place has a water view and very few lights. The illumination is a score or two of candles, which reflect off the newspaper tablecloths and sawdust floor. They start you with a few pounds of freshly baked bread, cut from a Buick-sized loaf near the kitchen. They follow with a fabulously fresh salad for two, which is enough for six, complete with a dressing that is the original concoction of the chef. Please do not ask what is in it. Just eat it and shut up. If you don't like garlic, just stay home. Conte's put chunks of garlic in everything but the water. The menu is unmatched in any place I have eaten, anywhere. The portions are gigantic. I have personally warned dozens of tourist to split a single order, unless they want leftovers for a few days. I can remember the look on one couple when they ordered two plates of bouillabaisse. They had enough food for the Partridge Family. The haddock and scallops always taste like they were caught that afternoon. A small portion of a typical menu consist of: ·
Fescue Polpettone fresh haddock and meatloaf, $ 9.80. If you want four-star service and a servile wait staff and the tiny meals typical of nouvelle cuisine, go to the Samoset. Warning: There is inherent danger contained in Conte's.
On a bitter cold night, with the wind blowing fiercely off the
Atlantic with the candlelight glowing and the wood stoves red-hot
and your belly as full as safety allows, you might just find yourself
a new home. If you leave Conte's without at least three packages
of leftovers, then you are a glutton.
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Most frequented area restaurant